So on my MySpace page I get a lot of friend requests on a daily basis.  Mostly from hot and horny chics that want to hook up with me no matter how far away they are from my house.  I’d like to think that I am so frickin’ sexy that these sex-beasts can’t resist but I know better.  I know they are only spamming me because I am a pinnacle of MySpace.  That without me, MySpace would be a disheveled electronic hovel in the ghetto on the information super highway.  I know that’s not true either.  These mighty sex magicians just want my money because I’m extremely wealthy.  They want me to plop scads of my ridiculous fortune into their bank accounts for the pleasure of viewing them on their web camera.  I know that’s not true because I am not rich.  I don’t even like to pay rent.  I know they want me to visit them on their webcam because of my charming personality and clever wit.  But that isn’t true either.  They want me to visit them so they can feel better about themselves.  And I fucking hate my job because it always interrupts my postings.  I hate wasting 17 minutes talking to some fucker about absolutely fucking nothing because they are cheap fucks and my sole existence is to hold their hand through their money saving process.  Fuck.  I’m goin’ homo.